It’s Better to Say You Don’t Know Than Give a Bad Answer

Posted on May 30, 2012 by jroesler728

by Jill Briscoe

Even when I’m old and grey do not forsake me oh Lord until I have declared your word to the next generation, your might to all that are to come. Psalm 71:16-18

I remember writing in my 50s ‘Old age lent the Spirits intelligence knows when to open its mouth! Now at the age of 76 you would think I could give my mouth a rest and let the next generation do the talking. That is till you come across such verses as these. Verses I took for myself for life beyond the 50s for the next leg of the journey.

Wisdom is ‘spiritual street smarts’. A spiritual intelligence given by the indwelling Spirit of God. This ‘knowing’, as the book of Ecclesiastes says, helps us to know among other spiritual things the: “time for talking and the time to stop. To keep our mouths shut.” ‘Least said; soonest mended’ my Mom used to say. God promises us His wisdom to know what and when to speak truth with grace into people’s lives and situations.

I’m a talker. That is what I do. That is what I’m asked to do. I like talking!  But the problem is when you run around the world talking; people think you have an answer for everything. You must have or people wouldn’t ask you to speak all over the place – they reason!  The temptation is to try to fulfill their expectations whether we know the answer or not! After all, we reason, Christians should always have an answer for peoples’ questions about life and faith – a misreading of 1 Pet. 3: 15!

On 9/11 I was flying home from Russia and was diverted to Newfoundland and spent 7 days in a Salvation Army church there. There was nothing for those of us from flight 929 United to do but talk, as we waited it out till we could go home.  A young doctor who was sitting next to me on the plane when the pilot gave us the news of the national emergency, set up a time after breakfast with me in the Army hall to continue our debate that had begun in the sky as we made our emergency landing in Newfoundland and waited for hours to get off the plane and be processed. We talked about the big issues of terrorism, good and evil, science and religion, the afterlife etc. He gave me a run for my money. He was young, bright, a cheerful agnostic and a thinker who didn’t buy my view of Scripture. I was old (all the little pockets in my brain that hold accumulated knowledge seemed to be full and unable to keep up with recent facts and figures)  I had told my new friend I was a convinced Christian and believed the Bible was true. This young 30 something man wanted to have serious conversations and was looking for some serious answers, as we waited out the repercussions of the terrorists’ attacks in New York.

Each day I prayed hard remembering Christ who lived within me was my wisdom and set about doing my best with the answers he was obviously expecting me to have, having heard me articulate my faith in Christ. I struggled to convince the young man of the truth about God and the gospel. Of course he wanted to question my understanding of an all knowing, all powerful all good God. “If God were so good and so knowing and powerful why didn’t he stop the planes hitting the twin towers” he asked. Nothing new here. The age old questions I hear all over this little swinging planet were asked again.  Why didn’t God intervene? Maybe there was such an all knowing all powerful being, but maybe he was impersonal. Too busy creating multiple more universes to care about the chaos on our little swinging planet. Somewhere in the recesses of my memory bank I remembered a debate on ‘Christianity and the Bible’ from my days at Cambridge University hundreds of years ago!

I was newly converted to Christ treading a new road with new friends, a new world view, and the dynamic of the living Christ beginning to enable me to live it out with new purpose: to talk about Jesus to everyone who came into the orbit of my life. We young converts at university had a formidable calling. Post  WWII students were stunned and grateful to find we were survivors of one of the most heinous and atrocious evil movements in History. We didn’t waste time in idle chatter. Every recess, every debate, every paper written and every dorm discussion we were asking WHAT WAS THAT? What just happened in our world?  How could pure evil have triumphed in so many countries?

Where was God? What was God? Why was God silent as the Jews His very own people- or so they said – were exterminated in the hellish Nazi camps? Was He there? Did He care?  As many of us new converts hit the debate in those days and found ourselves wrestling with answers first for ourselves then for our friends, we were so often no match for our contemporaries. One day our Inter Varsity Bible group leader told a few of us who were asking for pat answers that “It is better to say ‘I don’t know: I’ll find out for you,’ than to give a bad answer!”

Years later sitting with my plane load of shocked people from 18 different countries  with nothing to do but absorb the news and recover from the shock as we began to deal with the ‘new normal’ of our post 9/11 world, I remembered that advice.  God by His Spirit reminded me. I turned to my new friend the doctor and said “I don’t know the answer to many of your questions, and I suspect there is no answer to satisfy you, but let me think about this and we’ll talk tomorrow.” You’re a Christian” he teased me. “You’re supposed to know everything about your belief.”  I am a Christian “I replied, but I’m not God! And aren’t you glad about that!” Then I dared to add:” I’ll ask God to help me remember some things I learned about suffering and evil long ago!” It’s better to tell you that than give you a bad answer.”

He appreciated that. And in fact asked me as soon as we sat down with our coffee the next day—“well did your God tell you anything, Did your prayers get answered?”  I told him that yes, I remembered a verse of scripture, Deut. 29: 29 that had helped me leave the unexplained things in the hands of a Holy and Good God and trust Him with the secret things, while getting help from the things He has revealed. “I don’t know if you’ll be helped by it but can I read it to you?” “Yes” he said simply and so I found the place and handed it to him (something else my leader had told me to do years ago.)  It says: “The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things revealed belong to us and our children for ever, that we may follow all the words of this law.”

We talked long and intensely about the grand narrative in the Bible covering: Creation, Fall, Redemption and Glory and I was greatly helped by the Spirit’s promptings within as we talked of the things the Scriptures tell us about the mysteries of Suffering.   I was also reminded the Spirit cannot bring to our remembrance things we have not bothered to learn. Our job as disciples of Jesus is to never stop reading, marking, learning and inwardly digesting the truth, then sharing what we know with a postmodern 9 11 world.

Peter Drucker said an educated man is someone who has learned how to learn and never stops learning. Never stop learning folks!   We are never too young and never too old, in fact never too anything– there’s a world facing a lost eternity waiting for answers. But remember its Ok to say “I don’t know but I’ll find out.” Blessings

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A Prayer for a Difficult Time

Posted on May 28, 2012 by jroesler728

by Josh Wheeler

Father,

I pray for my friends during this transition. Lord, I pray that you would give them wisdom. I pray that you show them the truth of their situation. I don’t know the reality of their needs, but you do. I pray that we would see your work in this process. I pray Lord that we are able to see the situation from your perspective.

Lord, we believe that you are on a mission to glorify your Son and redeem the world. How does that happen in the midst of this? How are you working it together for the good? We ask these qustions because we know you are good, and we want to partner with you. We ask these questions because we understand your work is always good.

Father, we appreciate everyday that we have with you. Sometimes we wish we saw you face to face which would be better, but other times we want to stay and work to bring you glory. We have this life to glorify you, because in the next your presence will be all the glorification we will see. Father, give us the ability to run this life in a constant direction towards you-our home.

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What Crisis Reveals

Posted on May 23, 2012 by jroesler728

I thought I understood crisis. I have taught the basics of crisis response for years. I have met with people in crisis and have been told that I have been helpful. But this crisis has torn through my mask of competence and revealed the shadows beneath it.

My best friend’s house burned down this week. I was the only one in it when the fire started. I saw the raging flames on the deck towering over the height of the house. It looked to me like a war scene.
The only thing I could think of was to save her two little pets. I ran to get them and carried them into the front yard. By then the neighbor had called 911 and people began to gather to look.
I don’t know what they saw but I saw the dreams of my suffering friend burning up. Just the morning of this day she had let her tired painful body rest in a lawn chair and say she was finally done. She had worked so hard and the house was now at a place where she could enjoy it. Instead it is a charred horror scene that the city is giving us 10 days to demolish.
The lesson for me is that my pain has been expressed in sinful behaviors and thoughts. I have not spent long periods in prayer. I have not run to my Bible. I have not confided in my friends. I have been impatient with my husband, my sister and most anyone who calls and asks how I am and what they can do.
I can’t think of what they can do.
I am sad that I do not have a story that brings glory to my God but rather one that reveals there is much of His work that needs to be done in me.
My prayer is Father forgive ME for I know not what I do.
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My Son Came Home!!!

Posted on May 18, 2012 by jroesler728

Her radiant face spoke more loudly than the words that flowed. “It was 8:30 in the morning when the door bell rang. I couldn’t imagine who would be at our house at that time. I opened the door and there stood my son!”

Does anything bring more joy to a mother than for one of her children to arrive unannounced on Mother’s Day Weekend? This could have been a tough weekend for this mother. Her own mother died less than a year ago. This son was many states away serving in military duty and her daughter on another continent. But all potential sadness faded when she saw the face of her son. He had come home and he would be spending the weekend with her.
There was joy in the telling of this story to others.

Can we borrow this picture and remind ourselves that God loves us so much that He is delighted when we plan to spend time with Him, sacrifice something else in order to be with Him, tell Him the things that are too big or too little to tell to anyone else. Just sit and listen as He talks to us?
Let’s just show up and catch God’s smile!

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Set Him Free!

Posted on May 16, 2012 by jroesler728

by Shirlee Vandegrift

God speaks to us in many ways. If we are close enough to Him we can hear Him in the wind, in the baby’s cry, in the noise of a busy street, in the doctor’s office and in the school yard.

So many ways does he speak that we cannot possibly list all of them. He loves us so much that he wants to keep telling us in every possible way, all of the time.

When we are out and about in the world His voices are many and varied, but when we are shut in a hospital or a nursing home His voice can fade and grow dim.

The Enemy loves nursing homes and hospitals. What better place to strike? When resistance is down, and doubts arise; when we are home sick and lonely; when our family is too busy, when we are treated like a nonentity, the enemy is waiting to say, “See, I told you so. Who cares? Where is your God who says he will never leave or forsake you?”

We know the answer. That God is in you.

Take that God to a nursing home or hospital, and set Him free.

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An Unexpected Answer to Prayer

Posted on May 14, 2012 by jroesler728

On Saturday I went out to our camper to spend a day with God. Reading Psalm 13 from the Amplified Bible I was stopped at this phrase “lighten the eyes of my faith to behold Your face in the pitch-like darkness.” I pondered that for a long time and really wanted to see a vision of God’s face, but did not. 

Then on Sunday morning I was stopped by a man whom,others and I had helped with securing transportation to a job interview. He was looking for me so he could tell me that he had gotten the job. He was overflowing with gratitude. He commented that he planned to stay in a shelter until he gets his first paycheck.

The next day as I thought about this man, I realized that in his face, I had seen the face of Jesus. Someday, Jesus will say, “I was hungry and you fed me, I needed a place to sleep and you found one for me.  My name was    (this man)    .”

We have been able to secure an apartment for him for two months since the shelter he had planned to stay in is full. Yesterday he prayed with me and surrendered his life to Christ.

I am eager to watch this story unfold.

What thoughts does this story stir in you? Where have you seen the face of God?

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Remembering Mama

Posted on May 11, 2012 by jroesler728

I didn’t know that old people got lonesome for their mother. I thought that was an experience of young children.

Sunday is Mother’s Day. My mother died five years ago at the age of ninety-one. We really lost her ten years before that because her last decade was shadowed by dementia. Her death, which was peaceful, was more of a relief, at the time, than a grief.  

But now, the memories of the weight of caretaking have faded and the earlier memories of her intense interest in every aspect of my life, her eagerness to hear my stories, her passionate prayers for me and her confidence that God would answer them are what I think about.

I wish I could buy her a mother’s Day card this week—or maybe make her one. She’d like a home made one better. She would be thrilled with a personal photoshop book and be filled with wonder at how such a thing could be possible.

For a window into my mother’s life, watch the video below:

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Can This Machine Run?

Posted on May 9, 2012 by jroesler728

Originally posted Feb 17, 2012

Can you make this machine run? A friend advised me that a snow blower that I am trying to keep running might be beyond repair. “It is cheaply made,” he explained. I was surprised to hear this discouraging report because the paint is still shiny. It is only being used for a second year, but getting it started and keeping it running has made me hope it doesn’t snow. But is it really hopeless?

Before I made funeral arrangements for this snow blower I decided to ask another friend for his opinion. His answer was immediate. “Of course it can run. All an engine needs to run is fuel, compression and spark.” I became intrigued with this second opinion and eager to learn from this innovative artist for whom anything is possible. He taught me about the carburetor and I watched as every part was cleaned, installed and checked. When he was satisfied he pulled the cord for a manual start and the machine roared to life.

I went home and looked up the definition of fuel, compression and spark. This is what I learned. Fuel is any material that stores energy that can later be extracted to perform mechanical work in a controlled manner. Compression is force that tends to shorten or squeeze something, decreasing its volume. The term spark ignition is used to describe the system with which the air-fuel mixture inside the combustion chamber of an internal combustion engine is ignited by a spark. The resulting controlled explosion delivers the power to turn the reciprocating mass inside the engine.

Considering all of this leads me to ponder the work of the Holy Spirit in my life. The Spirit fills me with energy that can be released through me in His time. That with which He fills me in the morning is compressed by the experiences of the day He ordains so, that when the energy is released, it has increased in power but decreased in volume. (Especially if it refers to my talking.) And finally, the Holy Spirit is the spark that prompts action and delivers power.

Time will tell which mechanic’s appraisal of this snow blower was correct, but I am grateful for the mechanical lesson that has provided me with an analogy of how the Holy Spirit works in my life.

 Lord, produce a controlled explosion in and through me today.

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Releasing What Is Gone

Posted on May 7, 2012 by jroesler728

originally posted Feb 27

There is no doubt that aging involves loss. I have referenced processing loss as one of the essential ingredients to growing old gracefully. But how do we know when something is gone?

There is, of course, the loss that cannot be ultimately denied such as the physical death of a loved one.  Here the grieving process will protect by cushioning the impact with stages that lead to reality.  When we first hear the news we know it cannot be true, but as time goes on, we realize that it indeed is true.

But there are other losses that have less tangible markers. It may be the loss of marital intimacy, as one spouse, in the riptide of dementia, is becoming a stranger. It may be the loss of being your own home repairman as reaching high produces pain and lifting heavy is something you promise yourself you will not try again. It may be as simple as not being able to open the sealed bag in a box of cereal without reaching for a scissors. 

It may be the loss of being recognized as a leader in your area of work. Someone else is now in the spotlight. There is a new experience of insecurity as you seek to get in step with the drumbeat of new leadership.

It may be an eroding of confidence that God will work in the lives of your children in the way you have prescribed for Him.

Whatever the loss, how do we access the grace to be diminished? Do we need to start by recognizing that the thing we are clinging to is gone?

I look forward to your comments.

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