It’s hard for me to let go of the delusion that I have some control.
I try to defend this lie by setting up trust accounts, investing in life insurance and establishing safeguards.
God, in His faithfulness, is relentless in tearing down these fragile structures from which I try to extract a mindset of confidence and peace.
This journey of faith through aging eyes is faithful in providing experiences where trusting God is the only option. The diminishing of aging, in itself, erodes the illusion of control.
Our own bodies do not respond in the way we have learned to expect. Our circle of family and friends are in transition. We find ourselves deleting more contacts than we add. Those we have leaned on have limited power to keep their promises, much as they would like to.
All of this, and much more, is designed to lead us to a reality of dependence.
A friend recently asked me, “How much control do you really have?”
I wanted her question to be rhetorical but she waited patiently until I answered, “None.”
I am learning to believe it.
I wonder if faith through aging eyes empowers us to embrace loss of control as a gift rather than a lament.
What do we have to know about God is order to celebrate the gift of no control?